Pete quote...
"I ain't do nut'n in there but sleep" when referring to his bedroom.
One more...
"She's like china in a bull shop". I think he is referring to the tableware, not the country. In Pete's defense, he says this correctly most of the time.
On a recent hike, Pete was in front of me and as I watched his hands swinging back and forth, I could not help but notice that he had on two different gloves.
"Paul, why do you have two different gloves?"
"I just wear them to keep off the sun".
"But Paul, they are different". (Jokingly) "Do you have another pair just like them at home?"
"Yes."
"You have to be kidding me! Why didn't you wear matching gloves?"
"Oh, I don't have gloves that match these"
"So where did you get two unmatched gloves?"
"I found them. I only ever find left gloves" At that point he showed me that the glove on his right hand not only did not match the glove on the left hand. It was flipped over! (Imagine how you would put a left hand glove on your right hand, not that you ever would do that.)
If anyone has right gloves, please send them to Pete. No pairs please! That would be too normal.
I believe I mentioned that Cookie got an Amazon Echo Dot. For those of you unfamiliar, it is a voice activated link to the internet that can answer questions, keep a grocery list or play songs for you. All you have to do is read a bunch of sentences during the set up to familiarize "Alexa" with your voice.
For example... "Alexa, what is the temperature today?"
"Today's high is 84 degrees. The current temperature is 72"
Very easy right? Well, first you have to speak clearly and English should be your primary language, at least for the one we have. Well, you can imagine how much trouble Alexa is having at Pete and Cookie's house...
Some examples of questions asked...but not answered...
- Alexa, where are my glasses? I had them before we went out, now they are missing again!
- Alexa, does this mole look like it might be cancer?
- Alexa, how long can you store minced garlic in a hot closet after the jar has been opened? (Ok, it would have actually made sense had they asked that instead of keeping it and tasting it after 28 years!)
- Alexa, where is Cookie hiding money? (Only funny if you've read the previous blogs)
- Alexa, do these pants make my butt look big?
Okay, I may have taken some liberties on the list of questions, but you get the idea. In fact, if poor Alexa can even understand the questions it would be a miracle. For example...
- "where" is pronounced "were"
- "dog" is pronounced "dawg"
- "ten" is pronounced "tin"
- "birthday" is pronounced "birfday"
Cookie is trying to start a shopping list on Alexa. While this is very handy, it could be problematic. First of all, Cookie does not do the shopping, Pete does. To further complicate this attempt, his phone does not receive data making it impossible. Oh well, that won't stop them.
I will keep you posted on how Alexa is doing. Please pray for "her"....
Epilogue:
Feeling bad for Pete that he was wearing mismatched gloves, i bought him a pair of NEW gloves at the local auto parts store. They are the same gloves worn by pit crews the world over. At least that's what is said on the tag. Well, he wore them that morning on a hike, promptly leaving them in the outhouse at the trail head. When we went back later to see if they were still there, they were gone. ONE HOUR was the length of time he managed to hang on to them!!! I also gave him a pair of sunglasses which Julie did not think looked good on me. The day after giving him the glasses I asked where they were given the recent experience with the gloves... "I think I put them on my work bench"... Well, Julie and I checked the work bench and they were no where to be found. As we were leaving the garage we noticed something under the work bench up against the wall. Laying on my stomach I was barely able to reach the sunglasses that had been dropped and kicked under the work bench. On second thought, don't bother sending gloves...